Family Matters 

Dealing with Addictions 

Recently, Johann Hari wrote a piece entitled The Likely Cause of Addiction Has Been Discovered, and It Is Not What You Think (posted at http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936.html). J. Hari rightly states: “loving addicts is really hard and it was always tempting to follow the tough love advice that tells the addict to shape up” or else. Many families face this same dilemma - they are unsure about how to deal with children (teen and young adult), spouses, siblings, parents, or friends who are addicted to things, activities and substances including but not limited to drugs, alcohol, gambling, sexual behaviors, etc. 

Hari mistakenly believes that tough love necessitates a shunning of the addict and suggests that this will only deepen the person’s addiction and may cause someone to lose a loved one altogether. He concludes that it is necessary to “tie the addicts in my life closer to me than ever -- to let them know I love them unconditionally, whether they stop, or whether they can’t.” 

That is easier said than done, for sure. But is love enough for all addicts? What love are we talking about? 

Hari describes the Rat Park experiment by Professor Bruce Alexander in some detail and uses the results for his conclusion. Basically the professor argued (based on experiments with rats and heroin) that addictions are an adaptation rather than a chemical hook due to loneliness or disconnections in human relationships. Without close connections (emotional), the addiction becomes the cage from which the human addict cannot escape. Given a new set of social circumstances and human connections, the addict recovers. Hari uses the Vietnam soldier as another example; given a change of venue back to the US changed the drug habits of many soldiers. However, it is fair to point out that many addicts go cold turkey without changing relationships and venues. For example,  I remember my father as a chain smoker who tried to quit numerous times - especially when we nagged him about the dangers of smoking. He tried and tired to stop smoking but eventually would always give in to the siren call of the nicotine.  Until the day he was diagnosed with a serious medical problem; Dad went cold turkey realizing that he could possibly die thus losing all personal relationships. The decision to stop smoking worked; what was amazing to us was the peace he experienced while quitting for good. My mother kept smoking but that didn’t seem to phase him.  He also didn’t display the usual irritability or impatience that accompanied past attempts to stop smoking. Why the difference? Other addicts have similar stories. 

Back to the original hypothesis. The results of the animal studies cannot be directly correlated to human behavior due to the obvious differences between human and animal. Consider that the experiment results were very interesting but flawed from the start. Consider that the rats had no choice of being forced into the cage of isolation containing water with and without drugs. Whereas humans choose to use drugs and do so for various reasons - social, emotional, spiritual, physical and mental. Some choose the cage of isolation even if they have been well loved. The author also seems to think that if he just loves the addict more completely, he/she will rehabilitate easily. And even if he continues to abuse, the call to love is still the over-riding thing to do. While an honorable conclusion; it fails to take into account that perhaps the addict himself fails to love as he should. If a loving family can’t understand what makes Johnny want to get high in the first place, it is unlikely that they will be able to circumvent the problem by just loving him enough. I can say for certain, that we loved our father enough. But did he love enough? That may be the real question. 

Why do some people love well and others not well enough? The cultural experiences explains it that our woundedness comes from not being loved well enough. As Bill Cosby said years ago: hurt people hurt people. Seems like he knew well the hidden meaning behind that statement. But is there more to it than just being loved enough? Even well loved people make bad choices. Consider this. 

In the beginning, the first parents walked closely with God in a very special garden; He loved them completely and they knew it. Suddenly,  Satan came along with the resolve to disrupt that loving, personal relationship. Adam and Eve were blinded by the temptation to become like gods in control of their own destiny. If they had not been so blinded by their own concupiscence they would have realized that they were already like God’s image and likeness even though they would always be His creation and He the Creator. Yes, they were unique and well loved within that special garden - much to the angst of the evil one. 

The original design was perfectly simple and readily evident from the beginning. God loved them; after all He endowed the humans with minds to think and free wills to choose. He gave them the ability to choose between what they wanted and what God wanted for them. Theirs was a special relationship with God. All the other creatures were duty bound by instinct to love Him - unlike the human who was given the free choice. The humans were given the freedom to blame God when things didn’t go their way; or for not having enough; or for not being god. Yet, He knew all of this ahead of time. And yet He gave us imagination, creative powers, the ability to dream, plan and understand things intellectually. We are given the right to use these powers anyway we choose.  God’s love is readily evident everywhere; the real question became how much did we really love God over self? 

Sirach 15: 15- 17  captures the dilemma humans face: “If you choose, you can keep the commandments; loyalty is doing the will of God. Set before you are fire and water; to whatever you choose, stretch out your hand. Before everyone are life and death, whichever they choose will be given them.”

We know what Adam and Eve chose to do even though they were well loved enough! Like Adam and Eve, we too often swap our freedoms with addictions that  strip away our basic human dignity and freedoms even though we know that we are loved enough. Yes, it’s too easy to blame others, even God, for our addictions. In this age of loneliness, it is all too easy to blame others for our lack of authentic love for self, others and God. Pope Paul VI seems to have got it right: “The more we live for ourselves, the more our own choices will recoil on us and our decisions & desires, both individual & collective, & upon our manner of thinking and acting with respect to things & to people. It will have repercussions on our religious life as well.” And that is where we are at. 

All of us want to be happy in life -  few of us wake up in the morning wanting to be unhappy today or wanting to make someone else miserable too. On the other hand, too few of us  think deeply about what really makes me happy. Aristotle reasoned that there were four different levels of happiness; more recently, Fr. Robert Spitzer has written a lot about this. This ties in with the addictive behaviors. 

As we know., the human creature is a medley of body, mind and soul; in other words we are a composite of material and immaterial natures. What makes up our material nature? Our physical nature including our bodily cells, molecules, hormones, organs, and their functions. Physical feelings related to both pleasure & displeasure; for instance, hunger, feeling full; feeling tired or energetic are also part of our material nature. Our immaterial self is made up by our personality, beliefs, emotions, imaginations, psychologic makeup, abilities to estimate; common sense, memory, mind & soul.

All of us derive a certain sense of happiness from doing things that give us physical pleasure: eating, sleeping, expressing our love sexually, etc. God designed us to experience basic happiness when we have plenty to eat, get adequate rest, have leisure time in order that we take the time to eat, sleep and rest. Studies show time and again that all three of these contribute to our health and wellbeing. However, these positive feelings of happiness derived from physical pleasure last only for a very limited time. When any of us focus on physical pleasure at the expense of loving others, self and God we will experience negative consequences. And this is where the addiction begins - wanting to feel physical pleasure or stimulation - over and over again even while forsaking relationships and our other dimensions - spiritual, social, mental, emotional, cognitive, etc. After a time, the very thing that used to bring us pleasure, begins to cause pain and unhappiness. Pinocchio, while a fairy tale, explains the addictive process excellently. Again, Pinocchio was well loved but that didn’t stop him from exercising his free will when tempted by the bad boys to join their cause to seek physical pleasure every day, every minute of the day. The three other levels of happiness allow us to experience higher and longer lasting degrees of personal happiness. The second level of happiness is also mostly self centered like the first level. It results from accomplishing personal goals, receiving recognition for personal achievements, etc. This happiness is also fairly short-lived and so we keep accomplishing and setting higher and loftier personal goals. When we devote too much of our time to personal accomplishments, we can begin to feel over-worked, under paid and under-rewarded or regarded. When its all about doing to win, none of us can ever win often enough! I can relate to this as we turn our home inside out to improve it. Will it ever be good enough? Will it ever pay off in the long run to spend this much time on painting, cleaning, and renewing? Devoting ourselves to our own accomplishments tend to pit us against other people who may get in our way to the next promotion. 

We will achieve higher satisfaction/ happiness when we do things altruistically for other people.  We feel good as we help out someone, act with fairness and charitable justice in difficult situations, and when we strive to love others authentically. Once again, this can never make me sufficiently happy. Consider what happens when someone goes out of their way to help someone. With time, they may begin to feel un-appreciated, unloved, and used. Other persons can never fulfill all of my personal needs or wants - even in the best of marital/familial relationships. People will fail us in various ways. Some will die unexpectedly,  leaving us feeling empty or alone. But we can turn that unhappiness around by loving rightly. Recently a young husband/ father rote the following after losing his wife: “I can now offer up my suffering for my children and special intentions knowing there is apprise to suffering beings me consolation that good can come of it. I can now, in a minimal way, tie my suffering to the cross… “ Sometimes people leave us feeling  all alone even though they live in the same house as us. Others hurt their spouses and children if they choose to love someone else - more or better. At these times, humans are known to take it out on God. 

St Thomas wrote that our hearts will always be a bit restless until united to someone who will never die, will never leave us, will never change, will always love us, and will always be there for us. This person is God and the state where we will be completely happy is heaven.“In truth, if you find yourself trying to rely on anything else besides faith to maintain the practice of the presence of God, you will certainly fail, whether this is a dependency on your feelings, experiences, sincerely or good intentions or reasoning or plans .Faith depends on God, the other things depend on us and therefore they will fail.” This is the highest degree of happiness. 

Striving to order our lives around God’s Grand Plan will keep us happiest, least anxious, and more satisfied in this life. I daresay, it will also keep us free of addictions. It will bring us to a deeper appreciation and understanding of our human dignity. 

If we can bring everyone to know, love and serve God, then I think all of these arguments about legalizing drugs, the drug wars, and rehabilitating the recovering addicts will disappear. But if we continue to leave God out of the question and presume that answers all lie within social and psychological realms, the problems will remain. Yes, prudential human measures certainly help as well. But in the long run, we need to get back to loving God first and foremost, and then we will begin to love others as we should - even ourselves.

Compassion or compassion?

by Linda Kracht 

Recently I attended a debate arguing for and against surrogate motherhood — the act of contractually renting out one’s womb for to-be-parents. It takes about a split second of thought to realize that this newest way to technologically intervene/assist in the making of babies and parents is highly exploitable by one or all parties involved including the lawyers writing new statutes; the surrogate mother and/or the contracting parent(s). While compassion is used to argue for and against the procedure, clearly one side uses the term too loosely. So, let’s explore the topic from the perspective of Compassion vs compassion. 

Let’s begin with the actual definition or meaning of compassion; it is the feeling that wells up within someone when confronted by another person’s suffering. But it’s more than just feeling sorry for someone’s plight. Compassion makes us want to help relieve the unfortunate sufferer’s condition. The virtue of compassion is too often interchanged with altruism or empathy but the three are stand alone virtues; altruism is the “kind, selfless behavior often prompted by feelings of compassion, though one can feel compassion without acting on it, and altruism isn’t always motivated by compassion.” And empathy is our ability to ‘feel’ someone’s pain because we identify with or understand another person’s situation or feelings. In reality all three can stray far from virtuosity if/when actions taken [including motives, thoughts, feelings or what we identify with] are impure, immoral or self-centered. Most of us felt compassion for the young, captured Jordanian pilot who was burned alive by ISIS but few of us could do anything about it. For some, the feelings boiled over into feelings of outrage prompting acts of revenge /retaliation towards others. All of these different reactions blurs compassion and altruism and the virtuous-ness of our feelings. 

So what does Compassion vs compassion look like? Jesus has given us many examples and instances of what Compassion actually looks like. Jesus wept before springing Lazarus from his rocky grave; he cured the little girl after consulting with the parents; and he blessed the prostitute (sinners) before exhorting her (them) to sin no more. In each instance, Jesus actions combined Compassion with altruism and empathy to show us how to love those who suffered beside him. He is our model for Compassion - with the capital C. 

Compassion - lower case — is the human rendition of Compassion; it often veers off-course as we let our human thoughts, feelings, judgements, and desires interfere and distract. Other times, it gets pretty close. Thinking right now of Saint Maximillian Klobe, who traded his life for another in Auschwitz; then there is Miep Gies who hid Anne Frank and her sister during the Nazi occupation of Amsterdam. Mother Teresa is also a great example of just Compassion for the poor and impoverished of the world.  

Did you know that feeling Compassion is good for us and good for those who suffer? For instance, social scientists tell us “when we feel compassion, our heart rate slows down, we secrete the bonding hormone oxytocin, and regions of the brain linked to empathy, caregiving, and feelings of pleasure light up, which facilitates the desire to approach and care for other people.” But it does even more than that. By being mindful of other people’s suffering, we actually “feel safer around them, facilitating even more compassion within us.” Compassion also makes it more likely that we will learn how to cooperate with the suffering people rather than work against them. Compassion makes us feel good. Compassionate acts activate pleasure circuits in our brain… Having compassion for others allows us to feel happier in both the long and short term. But we have to keep in mind that feelings of compassion are not designed for self-centeredness but ought to garner more self-less and other-centered behavior and thoughts. If we are not gaining other-centeredness, perhaps we are merely feigning compassion. The whole point of feeling Compassion is to help relieve suffering among those we love or don’t even know. Ironically, studies which study the effect of compassion on the compassionate person seem a bit mis-guided don’t you agree? Nevertheless, the results help explain how natural law works… the more humanely we act, the better we become — morally, spiritually, mentally, and physically. But that should not be the reason to be compassionate, is it? 

Why is the lack of compassion introduced as one of the primary arguments for codifying/allowing/regulating the surrogacy experience? The proponents for surrogacy are quick to argue that the rest of us lack compassion — for the surrogate, the contracting parties, the legal teams trying to make surrogacy fair and ethical, etc. The case made for the need to have compassion the evening of the debate went something like this: “I am as Catholic as anyone in this room … but I believe that it is unjust to allow adoption (which effectively removes a baby from its biological parent and forces the baby into a home absent of the biological parents) while the Church argues against the Surrogacy Experience which unites biological babies [born to surrogate mothers] with their biological parents. This is wholly unfair. Besides that, the technology is here to stay so let’s make it as legally binding and protective of both the surrogate and the biological parents as we can. That is my role in this whole thing. And yes, there are many potential problems with surrogacy so we have to make just laws which protect all the parties involved. And yes, let’s help prevent the exporting of the Surrogacy Experience to third world countries where results can get complicated very quickly. And yes, when someone introduces morality, I lose the argument. And yes, renting out one’s womb is akin to babysitting for someone’s kids for a short while, so why not get paid for the service?”

Here, here said the 17 surrogate mothers in the audience. Hold on there said the other attendees who may not have been able to cogently explain why the Surrogacy Experience is wrong but they just knew it to be wrong in their hearts.

Both sides had plenty of time to present their case and of course the lawyer arguing against surrogacy made the most logical and ethical sense in my opinion. But she lacked compassion according to the other side. Did she really? She introduced facts such as: all in-vitro fertilization procedures create hundreds if not thousands of fertilized embryos that are left in a sort of limbo. In this state, they are not given a chance at life — at least not yet.  Nor are they given an immediate death sentence — at least not until they have served out their utilitarian purpose which is to be ready and waiting if / when the parents decide they want more implantations with a surrogate mother at some future point in time — or not. The embryos in waiting lives are suspended within artificial, sterile and cold (cryogenic ) tubes awaiting a life or death sentence based on feelings.

Isn’t this alone an assault on the dignity of that new little person’s personhood? Where is the Compassion for their existence?  How can one call for compassion for the infertile couple or the surrogate mother willing to rent out her womb for hire while ignoring the plight of the embryo in limbo? What’s more, does anyone display Compassion, if they pick and choose what/who/when to be compassionate about the frozen persons lying in-state? If the contracting parents set up conditions for who they will/will not give life to, why should the rest of us feel any compassion for their condition of infertility? Why should we care about their inability to have any children when they assert their right to deliberately ignore or select the best of the frozen ones? The facts are that every case of surrogate placement creates tens if not hundreds of fertilized embryos that are misplaced, destroyed, or forgotten about. Did you know that most surrogates — the womb for hire nannies — are expected to sign a clause agreeing to having an elective abortion for a less than perfect pregnancy? For example, if at some point in time the fetus is determined to have Spina Bifida or some other anomaly, the surrogate mother agrees to have an abortion. Where is the Compassion in that decision and agreement? It is abundantly clear to me at least that the contracting parents expect to have a near perfect if not blue ribbon baby after paying $35,000 — $65,000 or they don’t want it and neither do they want anyone else to raise this little imperfect him or her. That is conditional love at best and why should we be forced to feel compassion about such a contradiction?

Shouldn’t the contracting parents be concerned about the health and wellbeing of the surrogate mother? Of course they are and that’s why they add clauses about not using drugs, alcohol, etc., during the pregnancy! In reality how does that clause prove concern for - the surrogate or the pregnancy outcome? What about the health of the contracting mother who has to endure super-doses of hormone treatments for purposes of harvesting an abundance of healthy eggs? The proponent for the Surrogacy Experience flippantly said that women naturally have more eggs than they can ever need or use — so pre-gathering eggs is never a problem. This man clearly fails to understand the female reproductive system. Women enter menopause in large part because she has run out of viable eggs — and sometimes that occurs prematurely creating all sorts of problems. When a baby girl is conceived, she will have several hundred million eggs but even at her birth, she will only have one or two million eggs left in her ovaries. By puberty, the number has dropped precipitously to just a few hundred thousand; and by her mid 40’s she will have few left. The egg follicles degenerate over time due to a process call atresia. Factors speeding up the rate of atresia include illness, disease, genetic factors, environmental, and more. So to presume that women have plenty [have more than they need] is asinine at best. Furthermore, the unnatural order of harvesting eggs is sure to put a wrench on the natural-pace of atresia.

And then there are the spiritual and psychological effects to be considered for both the mother and father to be who treat the collection of their sexual reproductive cells, the in-vitro fertilization technique, and the making of their baby as just one more utilitarian activity that will get them what they want! Both collection processes (masturbation for the male and egg harvesting from the mother) render the making of a baby into a commodity that can be bought and sold for a price. And then there is the surrogate mother’s spiritual and psychological makeup to consider. Her sense of compassion for the infertile couple is completely blurred by the exchange of money for her womb for hire services which was previously stated as ranging from $35,000 to $65,000 / baby.

My compassion runs short when called forth by those who profit from things such as the Surrogacy Experience. It makes perfect sense for advocates of surrogacy to use the compassion trump card now. The ordinary facts are too easily refuted. So, it makes sense to employee a battle plan that has worked for other social movements [ gay marriage, abortion, divorce]. This plan tries to engender compassion for the infertile couple/individual while also diminishing all objections to any technological methods used to assert a person’s right to parenthood. But when was that right [to parenthood] established and by whom - other than God? Lots of loaded words from the ‘other perspective’ show put us on alert that something else is going on other than lack of compassion. 

Furthermore, my compassion tank runs out of gas even faster when I hear a surrogate mother suggest:“I have no emotional ties what-so-ever with the baby. It is a business transaction”. Yet Saint John Paul ll reminds us that motherhood itself “implies from the beginning a special openness to the new person: and this is precisely the woman's 'part.' In this openness, in conceiving and giving birth to a child, the woman 'discovers herself through a sincere gift of self. '(MD §18) 

My compassion tank runs empty when hearing a mother whine about having to make a decision about the 5 embryos left in cryogenics after claiming she has enough live birth children. And that was my personal experience with the In-Vitro Experience. One day I had taken our daughter to speech therapy and in walks a mother with three precious young boys — a set of twins (about 4 years old) and a two year old. Yes, they were rambunctious little cowboys! As we talked, the mother revealed that they were the result of in-vitro fertilization. The twins were born after implanting 5/12 embryos — natural selection left her with twins rather than quintuplets. She added that the first pregnancy took a toll on her [that kind of fell on deaf ears since I was there with our seventh child; sorry that seems to be my lack of compassion talking again]. Anyway, the mother horrified me by complaining about the having to undergo a second pregnancy just to use up a few more embryos — although she did admit that she felt a bit guilty about having 7 in Limbo. Not wanting another set of twins, she specified that no more than 3 embryos be implanted knowing that if more than one survived the transplant, she would have elected to have a reduction pregnancy abortion. Lucky for her, only one embryo made it to term and his name was Jimmy. The mother went on to state that she did not want to have another pregnancy but was conflicted about the embryos still awaiting her decision. So she asked me what to do. Seeing my horrified expression and hearing no response, she said “Well - what do you expect me to do?” If she had asked my opinion 10 years ago, I could have given her many answers. That day, I was too dumbfounded to come up with anything remotely compassionate or sensible or ethical. 

We have arrived at a time in history whereby we create contradictions that have no ethical solutions.  We completely fail in Compassion at the right times. I thought of this song written in 1969; it is entitled In the Year 2525 which seems to describe much of modern day thinking. 

“In the year 2525, if man is still alive

If woman can survive, they may find

In the year 3535

Ain't gonna need to tell the truth, tell no lie

Everything you think, do and say

Is in the pill you took today

In the year 4545

You ain't gonna need your teeth, won't need your eyes

You won't find a thing to chew

Nobody's gonna look at you

In the year 5555

Your arms hangin' limp at your sides

Your legs got nothin' to do

Some machine's doin' that for you

In the year 6565

Ain't gonna need no husband, won't need no wife

You'll pick your son, pick your daughter too

From the bottom of a long glass tube

In the year 7510

If God's a-coming, He oughta make it by then

Maybe He'll look around Himself and say

"Guess it's time for the Judgement Day"

In the year 8510

God is gonna shake His mighty head

He'll either say, "I'm pleased where man has been"

Or tear it down, and start again

In the year 9595

I'm kinda wonderin' if man is gonna be alive

He's taken everything this old earth can give

And he ain't put back nothing

Now it's been ten thousand years, man has cried a billion tears

For what, he never knew, now man's reign is through

But through eternal night, the twinkling of starlight

So very far away, maybe it's only yesterday

Can You Name Them?

by Linda Kracht 

Can you name them? Can you name the primary virtue that is one’s personal resolve of the mind and heart to maintain discipline over one’s physical (and sexual) body? The same virtue couples natural desires with what (another virtue)?  What is required to maintain this virtue (three points)? What is the primary and opposing vice to the primary virtue? This primary vice couples natural desires with what other vice?

Please do not plug these questions into your handy dandy internet browsers because, yes, the answers will likely pop right up. These are not trick questions. But if there is a very general inability to get the answers right from among this population of readers, it is highly likely that others will not know the answers either. And if people in general are not acquainted with these virtues and their opposing vices, it helps to explain why society seems to be going in nay wrong directions. When we should know but don’t know these things, then we can’t teach them or give witness to them to those are less likely to understand and/or embrace them. The opposing vices in question explain why hurt people really are hurting many other people - of all ages.  

Please send your answers to each of the above questions along with your name, religious affiliation, age, address, and email address to our email account: info@fortifyingfamiliesoffaith.com. Respondents who answer all five questions accurately will receive a free bookmark from our collection. All names received (with right answers) will be entered into a drawing to receive a free copy of A Book For All Seasons. 

Obviously the readers are on the honor system which means that we presume you will answer the question without any personal help; i.e. you will not look up answers from any sources or resources. And you are the person sending in the response.

There is a purpose behind this quest and it is not to give away free things or to introduce me or my company  [Fortifying Families of Faith] to you. The responses received will help form my next talking points while teaching parents and their adolescents about virtues in general and more specifically about these virtues in question. My hypothesis is already in place; it will be up to the readers to debunk or strengthen it.

If you do not receive anything from me you can assume that your answers were wrong - or at least one of them. You will find the right answers in my column entitled Can You Name Them - the followup or by emailing me. 

Lastly, donations or outright orders of our materials are always welcome to help defray costs for projects such as this one. Mail donations to www.fortifyingfamiliesoffaith.com. 

I am looking forward to hearing from you! 

Parents and the Pill

Many parents claim they don’t know what to do or say to their teens about sexuality, yet, their actions belie their claims! Parents using these excuses are often responsible for bringing their teens into clinics for birth control pills, shots, or other contraceptive devices. Other times, they allow school based clinics or Planned Parenthood clinics to insert themselves as the parental authority in matters of sex, drugs, alcohol, or other areas of concern.


When parents either directly or indirectly let others form their teens in matters of faith, morals, or sexuality, they are giving their consent loud and clear- this communicates their own personal disinterest, fear, approval of the others' message, and more.

It seems disingenuous to claim they don’t know what to do or say as they take their teens in the doors of Planned Parenthood. It seems equally disingenuous when parents don’t resist the efforts of the school based clinics or doctors’ offices which prescribe pills, shots, or vaccinations for sexually transmitted infections. It also seems disingenuous for parents to claim they don’t know where to start when they haven’t searched for material to work with! Parents have got to stop using lame excuses while pretending not to know what is going on!


Everybody knows what is going on! Many parents have handed their responsibilities and duties over to secular, irreligious institutions which promote immoral sexual behaviors. Teens are looking for leadership, guidance, and spirituality. Pills, shots and condoms won’t give them what they are searching for. Visit http://www.fortifyingfamiliesoffaith.com/ for help connecting with your teens! Daughters Forever, Sons Forever may be just the type of curriculum you are looking for.


On a side note. Have you ever wondered why there is a high percentage of heavier teens today? Look no further than the birth control shot: Depo-Provera! This type of contraception causes an average weight gain of 11 pounds and a 3.4% increase of body fat when used for 3 or more years! Users are more likely to become obese when compared to girls who do not use hormonal birth control. Furthermore, over one fourth of girls and women who were given the shot experienced “significant and dangerous body composition changes.”