My Mom's Night Out

MY MOM'S NIGHT OUT 

Nearly every girl – big or small – loves to dress up, don beautiful jewelry, get her hair fixed, and look beautiful when she walks a “red carpet” at some point during her lifetime. For most girls, such a procession actually takes place several times even if the rest of the world doesn’t notice! These events are always special enough for the girl!

When was your last 'red carpet event'? Just last week, we witnessed a granddaughter process up the aisle for her First Communion. The event had all the markings of having been honored with VIP status. Teresa certainly felt it - materially and immaterially. And then there is the procession for Confirmation. Every girl dreams about  walking the 'red carpet' at her wedding first on the arm of her father and exiting on the arm of her newly beloved - all the while looking radiant and gorgeous. Let's not forget those other lesser chances to walk the red carpet: Homecoming; Prom, friend’s weddings and other formal events. These also incorporate mini grand marches on  imaginary red carpets. 

The red carpet treatment refers to those special events in which guests are greeted and welcomed graciously by a person or group of persons. It signifies being treated royally; the welcoming helps make the guest feel very important  and that is the source of the acronym:  VIP (very important person).  The red carpet was first introduced in 458 BC by Greek playwright Aeschylus during the performance of Agamemnon? It continues to be used during ceremonial and formal occasions and visits by of heads of state, celebrities, royalty, clergy and even the popes. 

Why red? According to Aeschylus, red was the color assigned and reserved for the deities; thereafter it became associated with royalty and luxury.

On April 29, 2014 the red carpet was rolled out for the premiere of Moms’ Night Out - an event I was fortunate to be invited to attend with daughter Kelly. While the actual movie premiere took place inside the Chinese Theater (where films have been shot) on Hollywood Blvd., the main characters, screen writers, producers, etc. walked the red carpet into the theater. 

  

The red carpet events generate a lot of interest, buzz, and intrigue among everyone on the street! While outsiders are not told when the talent will show up; the premiere is a well orchestrated event by the promoters for the movie. Media is invited to attend and they arrive hours ahead of time staking out their best position along the red carpet. They know where to line up since the red carpet is laid out well ahead of time as well along with publicity backdrops. (See enclosed pictures)  The red carpet doesn’t seem very glamorous due to the industrial fencing positioned to keep media several feet away from stars who emerge onto the carpet from shiny, black limos. Bystanders have little opportunity to get very close to the area or the stars. 

The red runway gives the media what they want: the opportunity to snap photos and shout out questions to the stars as they pass by hoping to get one or  more to stop and chat for a few minutes. Questions shouted out range from interest in what the stars are wearing, to what they are working on next and even personal questions. Responses are instantly posted, tweeted or Instagram-med for a star-struck person's consumption. 

The event bolsters the desired effect: attracting hundreds - if not thousands – of non-participants to the area in hopes of raising interest in the new film that is scheduled for release in theaters everywhere. Having the chance to see a celebrity in person helps to boost the interest among the general public. 

This is how local girl, Kelly Kracht, (behind Patricia Heaton in photo) came to walk the red carpet. But, first things first. 

Last summer Kelly was employed by Carmel Communications, a Catholic PR firm, out of Atlanta, GA when the “boss lady” mentioned that they were going to be promoting a new movie that had yet to be shot. Kelly – intrigued with how movies are made – asked whether she could take time off in order to help make that movie. She thought immersion on the set would help her promote the movie when that became necessary. After mulling over the request, Lisa Wheeler, the boss-lady, agreed that it would be a great opportunity for Kelly, Carmel Communications and the movie makers. Wheeler had a great working relationship with the Erwin brothers (show's producers) due to previous promotions and agreed to the request. What better way to get an inside look at the way movies are made, the talent, the mission of the production company, and the film itself? Wheeler contacted the Erwin brothers and they agreed to bring Kelly on as a set production assistant. So, Kelly drove to Birmingham, Alabama in her brand new Honda to see firsthand how movies are made.  

 Moms’ Night Out was shot over a period of six weeks. During that time, Kelly did everything from controlling traffic, to alerting the talent of their upcoming time for action, to painting actress’ nails, to getting coffee for talent and crew, to allowing her car to be used for some of the shots; to babysitting the younger talent. Kelly loved the work despite the many long, hot nights spent on the set. Most of the shooting took place during the evening/night hours since the movie is about several moms’ night out.  

The work – though rewarding – proved one thing to Kelly. She would not want the life of a film star. It's not the work - though intense! Rather it's the obvious loneliness that sets in when the stars have to spend weeks and months away from family and friends. On top of that, everywhere they go they are  hounded for autographs, photo shots, and interviews. They really have to avoid the public if they want any privacy! Consequently, they seem a bit wary of  new people. They are too used to people wanting something from them. Kelly, though having many opportunities, did not ask for something from the stars. 

During ordinary conversation with them, she learned that that they like their work, they love their families but they do not necessarily enjoy the publicity or the celebrity status. They endure the red carpet in order to secure more work in a highly competitive field. There are only so many movies made in any given year! Female stars also have the added benefit of being loaned a $70 K pair of earrings and/or a $200 K diamond bracelet to wear for the world premiere- every girl loves bling! 

After the filming, everyone went back home to their usual gigs. In this case, Kracht went back to Carmel Communications to promotion of this film and many other works to the Catholic audience. And so this is how Kelly came to walk the red carpet with actress Abbie Cobb – aka Bridgette in Moms’ Night Out. Each PR person is assigned one or more talent  for the purpose of introducing him/her to the media that has waited for their chance to interview a star. 

After the premier was the after party – the invitation only opportunity to take photos and mingle. The food & drink bill had to total more than any wedding we have ever attended but the expenses were part of the movie budget. There was a lot of food to go around that is for sure. 

I had the advantage of being just a spectator with an inside edge. It was exciting to be on the red carpet and to  speak to the talent who stood near by. I also enjoyed catching sight of other actors who came in support of the film along with the stars' families and friends. I had the privilege of meeting the screen writer for Mom's Night Out and her husband and two young children. I also got to chat with an actress from God’s Not Dead who will remain unnamed to protect her desire for anonymity.

Kelly had invited me to the world premiere given its close proximity to Mother’s Day – lucky me. Thank you Kelly! It was great to see her work the professional end of her life with grace and ease while staying grounded to what really matters in life. 

By the way, the movie is good. Of course if I were writing the script, some of the lines would have been different. Hmmm... here's a thought. Maybe I should try and write a movie script to realize just how hard it really is! By the way, information about the movie can be found at   http://momsnightoutmovie.com/ or  http://www.momsnightoutmovie.com/.

One final thought, even though this red carpet event was special, the one that matters most to me lies within my home. As Cardinal Mindszenty once said: The most important person (VIP) on earth is a mother. She cannot claim the honor of having built Notre Dame Cathedral. She need not. She has built something more magnificent than any cathedral – a dwelling for an immortal soul."

So next time you think that life is just not spectacular enough, think again. Count all your blessings. And then imagine, walking  that crystal carpet into heaven while being introduced to the King. That will be the most spectacular enough for all of us. And just think of our VIP status then! 

 

Videos used during Parenting Teens Building Strong Futures

Embedded are links to the videos shown Saturday (as well as several others that we recommend watching with your teen ). Thought you might enjoy watching them again! 

Inspirational video for Parents

The 'Mom' Song

'Eating Out' Ad from Blue Cross of MN

MIT Gangnam Style

'Money' - Liza Minnelli, Joel Grey (not shown)

Every 15 minutes a Teenager Dies from Drunk Driving (not shown)

R.E.M. - Everybody Hurts (video)

Social Media Revolution 2011

11 Facts about Body Image

Every Life is Beautiful: Melinda and Will Delahoyde (not shown)

Every Life is Beautiful: Robert Amaya

The Miracle of Life - Right to Life Video - Hyper Pixels Media

Every Life is Beautiful: Gianna Jessen

Fishers of Men (Part 2) 

Dad's Life 2011

What is Worldview? (Not shown) 

WatchingYou

St. Therese's Canticle of Love (Not shown) 

A few questions and thoughts from a connected mom

I am interested in reading the one on Parenting Good Social Citizens as I want to ensure there are "how to" tools that parents can use to teach our children social and emotional skills that you seem to refer to. But most important: how to engage children in having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ? And how to prevent that in later years they rebel because they feel that parents forced the faith on them.

I have a 7 year old daughter is just said last night "It is MY choice, not yours mom" on whether she should do something or pray. And for the first time, I hear "Mom, I really like someone"... thank God my husband Jesus and I don't react but rather respond asking wisdom from the Holy Spirit!

So do you have tools to help us counteract these lies that the enemy is feeding our children? If we do not address them, these lies become entrenched and they base their choices and behaviors on these deceptive thoughts. The enemy is actively working to create a divide among children and parents. The truth is that the faith formation classes offered at parishes are ineffective at building and strengthening that relationship in Christ so they can support the work and faith formation and leading by example we do at home. M. C.
 

My response: 

I think my book (Mothers Forever, Fathers Forever: Parenting Against the Tide)  fits the bill that you are hoping for. That was my intent – to offer tools on how to parent good social citizens, children of faith, etc. ... I think I forgot to attach the first lesson so here it is again.

How did you respond to your daughter when she said it is her choice? My suggestion would be the following: God, as a loving parent, gave us all free will. This is true, all of us have our own choice to make however that is also why God gave you parents rather than having human babies on their own completely after being born like many animals. Certainly by the age of seven, all animals are on their own. So by your age, they have to fend for themselves, feed themselves, etc. I don’t think you want that or are ready for that. Then God also laid on our hearts the commandment of obedience. We obey for good reason (outlined in my book). Even Jesus was obedient to his father . Children have the duty of obeying their parents in part because of appreciation for being given life freely, being taken care of …. Etc. So, right now, it is our choice to pray and since you are a child and bound by obedience, you will pray as well with us.

 Regarding I really like someone. That’s fine dear except, why do you really like that someone… Then have that discussion and suggest that love and like are two different things. IT’s ok to like someone but we are called to like everyone. Inform her again, that at the age of 7, one is not ready to be exclusive. Not even at 15 or 18. (again, in the book)….

The book doesn’t have these types of examples, that’s the purpose of the book club. And also my blog… check that out as well. I am happy to continue our dialogue. I am going to post your questions and my responses on my blog after I finish with this email.

Also you should ask her where she came up with the choice thing? I doubt it was her own idea…. So that would be a good line of questioning to pursue.

And I agree, the forces are there to separate parents from teens and children. That is the whole point of our Parenting Teens: Building Strong Futures; Daughters Forever, Sons Forever, etc.

Sincerely,

Linda Kracht 

Fortifying Families of Faith 

Another scandal, more hand wringing, assurances from the Church that they will try harder... The result is that people lose faith in their church leaders and it affects their faith in God. That's the truth. That's the problem. What's the solution?

While it is unlikely that the majority of the faithful will serve on the panel to investigate sexual misconduct by priests, we ought to. After all, we are the faithful in the pews who year after year support the Church with our time, talent and treasure. We are also the ones who want to protect our children from abuse of any kind. We are also the source of tomorrow's priests. We have a lot to give We have a lot of reasons to make sure this stops happening.

In light of that these are my suggestions, concerns, and solutions.

1. It's time to start admitting that clergy misconduct is a whole lot more than misconduct. It is SIN with a Mortal consequence. It destroys lives of faith. It is sin that shrinks membership into the church. It is sin that fails to evangelize.

2. Its time to admit that clergy misconduct gets its start long before the actual incident of pedophilia or adultery takes place.

3. It's time to admit that few parishioners want a priest to act as minister when he is mired down by personal temptations and problems.

4. It's time to admit that failing to admit the truth is always problematic.

Long ago a priest friend told me that the Bishops and priests who seem to hide behind sanitized press releases and lack courage to fully support all aspects of authentic, orthodox life and love issues fail to do so because they have been compromised by some personal sin. This could explain the lack of leadership in and outside of the church.

5. It's time to admit that clergy misconduct includes downloading pornographic images of any kinds.

6. It's time to admit that clergy visits to brothels, hot spots in the city, chat-rooms,etc. is an act of clergy misconduct. It is not just playing with fire as suggests Fr. McDonough. It is an act of misconduct that ought to be punished immediately.

7. It's time to admit that a priest's  sexual encounter with any person, any age of person, any time, any place is an act of clergy misconduct. But acts of pedophilia are even more heinous because it involves a minor who is young, impressionable, and vulnerable. Priests take the vow of permanent chastity and we can rightfully and righteously hold them to that standard - no matter how perverted our general society is getting. We have to have priests willing to live differently if we are to teach others how to love. 

8. It's time to change the language and the words used to describe the misconduct.

9.  It's time to change the way church leaders inform seminarians about the consequences of the misconduct. For example, several years ago, I asked our parish assistant priest what/how the seminary trains them  with regard to sexual scandals. This is his reply: "They tell us to make sure we never involve a parishioner!" My reply: a priest preparing a young couple for marriage would never tell either person to make sure any adulterous affair didn't involve someone they knew! Why any seminary training would suggest the above, explains the problem - partly.

Also there is no way to give proper feedback when a young seminarian is assigned to a parish. Why are there not proper channels that we can rely on to offer the feedback - both positive and negative.

10. Corporations have long instituted a policy of inspecting all computer usage among employees for inappropriate usage. The Diocese ought to institute the same scrutiny of the priests' computers, laptops, iphones, any internet access points.  The first offense is punishable immediately and appropriately - removal from ministry.

11. Provide clergy living accommodations in which priests are held accountable to each other. The priests ought to live with other priests.

12. Security cameras ought to be installed in each office.

13. Accountability to everyone is necessary. Priests need to be protected from loneliness by instituting regular community discussions about these matters. It's not happening now according to more than one priest source.

Simple solutions for complex problems. These work.